Hazards Along the Way

For my birthday, which happened to land on the Easter holiday/holy day, my family joined me for a round of golf on a beautiful course near our home.  It started off a little overcast, but the sun soon broke through the clouds and remained bright for the rest of the day.  We were playing very well, enjoying each other's company, the beautiful scenery and the cold beer.  Part of the course's beauty is the woods and creeks running through and around the land.  There are also a fair number of sand traps scattered among the holes.  If you are lucky (or should I say skilled?), you manage to avoid most of those hazards.  But even the best golfers can find themselves at the bottom of a ravine or swinging at a ball with sand flying everywhere.  It's not like we don't know these hazards are coming.  The GPS on the golf cart provides numerous details on the course layout, though turtles, snakes and alligators are not on their radar.  If you plan (and play well), you can avoid a majority of these stroke adding areas.  Sometimes you can psyche yourself out thinking too much about a hazard - like the water - and end of splashing right into it because you thought so much about not going in.  Bring extra balls, because that is bound to happen. 

In life, as we go about our business, performing our work or attempting a number of activities and adventures we are bound to come up against some obstacles or hazards.  Some of these are real and if we are careful in our planning we are prepared when they arise. Others are imaginary.  We believe that people won't like something or we will have too many hoops to jump through so we don't even take the first step.  We fail without even trying. 

I encourage you to realistically analyze the possible hazards, prepare for those events that might actually happen and stop letting the imaginary road blocks keep you from taking the first step.

Here's to your dreams coming true - if you will only get out of your own way.

Shoulding

"If you want this - you should do this".  We are bombarded with books, magazines and sometimes friends and family telling us what we should do in order to achieve a certain state of being that they believe we should achieve.  The problem arises when we believe them and follow their shoulds instead of listening to our hearts and our wants and desires. 

An assessment that I use in my Creativity and Risk Taking coaching and training is the Creatrix.  Creativity is the ability to produce new ideas and possibilities. Risk taking is driving the idea forward, even in the face of adversity.  The assessment measures your creativity and risk taking orientations.  We can improve our creativity and risk taking.  The results of the Creatrix give you tips on how to accomplish that.   

One of the drivers for creativity is inner-directedness.  Inner directed people determine their own expectations and norms and march to their own drummer.  They don't let others "should" on them.

So what can you do to be more inner-directed and experience less "shoulding"?

• Start asking - what would I really do in this situation?
• Pay more attention to your intuition and follow through.
• Stop changing your thoughts or behaviors when someone else makes a comment - stick with what is truly you. 

What other ideas do you have?  Please comment here.

All In The Bag

When we start out as children our creativity is free and flowing.  The older we get, the more rules and procedures we are required to follow and the less likely we are to veer from the beaten path.  In order to remind adults to "color outside of the lines" and think outside the proverbial box, I utilize creativity exercises in my speaking engagements and training classes. 

I have an exercise ready for an upcoming session, but decided to have a backup ready in case some of the participants had already been exposed to my game in a previous presentation. I prepared quart size plastic bags for each small group.  I filled the bags with a half dozen items - the same ones in each bag.  This time I included props like a bag of M&M's, a die, and a pipe cleaner. Each group will be given a bag and instructed to create a word using the first letter of each item they were given.  Most people will play with the items in the bag but not think to use the "bag" as one of the items.  What would you have done?

It is a great reminder to look at things differently - from all angles - so as not to miss an opportunity.  Remember, it's not "all in the bag"!

Un-Like Minded People

I attend a variety of business organization meetings, attracted to them based on the topic.  I've heard from oil and gas executives, human resource personnel, engineers, marketing gurus, coaches and dreamers.  I find it thought provoking, inspiring and motivating to spice up my life with this variety of information and perspectives.

At one recent meeting the new people were invited to stand up and introduce themselves.  Many times in their introductions I hear that term "like-minded" people used.  They are delighted to be in the presence of like minded individuals.  There is nothing wrong with that.  I like to work or party with like minded people also.

But I propose that we could up our enjoyment of life, our creativity and our enthusiasm for things we have lost enthusiasm for if we associated with "un-like minded people".  If you want to be more creative, try a few of these things off my list -

• Challenge yourself with three problems every day
• Brainstorm with friends
• Hang out with people you don't typically hang out with
• Work on your self-talk - remind yourself how creative you are
• Cross-train in the arts - try painting or piano lessons or something you've always wanted to try
• Nurture a secret work project
• Join an inventor’s or a writer's club

Let me know what new ideas or insights arise from this challenge.

Treasures All Around Us

I attended an afternoon workshop on defining and working with all the resources available to you to move your personal development or your business forward.  It was an interesting look at all we have around us that we typically forget or pass over as we rush through our week.  We were asked to make a list of 100 resources that we have and were given a few minutes to complete the task.  Pens and fingers on tablets moved furiously down the page listing person after person and item after item.  Most people had 30 or more resources listed in a very short time.  We shared part of our list with the group and the ideas from others in the room inspired us to add to our lists.  One that I mentioned was clutter.  We think of it as junk but if we were to go through many of the boxes stuffed in our attic or under a bed - we might find treasures that could be used in our work or in some other way we hadn't previously considered.  A teacher friend of mine planned to have her students help her sort through some boxes of supplies she had accumulated over the years.  She knew that they would be able to come up with numerous ideas on how the "stuff" could be used in alternative ways.  Those little ones were creative problem solvers. 

As I look around the yoga room at the gym I find a number of resources available to the class that we aren't taking advantage of.  We could use the walls to help us balance or open our shoulders as we try to stack our hips and shoulders on top of each other in a one-legged balance, or stuff a sock under the heel of our hand to help take pressure out of the risk in a pose, or hold onto our friend to assist in our balance or gently pushing their leg higher to give them more of a stretch - so many resources around us that easily get ignored.

When is the last time you looked at your stuff and played with ways to utilize it differently? 

Engage friends, family or co-workers for a brainstorming session around a box of stored items and see what possibilities emerge. 

The Funnies With a Bit of Truth

I love to read the comics on Sunday (and every other day as well).  I don't usually read them all but I do have a few favorites that I am faithful to.  One of them is "Dilbert".  Maybe it is because I left the corporate world (took a risk) and can now laugh at the things that used to stress me out when I was in the middle of them.  It is amazing how close to reality the comic is. But I suppose it is because real people write to Scott Adams with their real work problems and "can you believe he or she did this?" stories that make it so great.  It is good to be able to laugh at the craziness around us. 

Along with "Peanuts" and "Garfield" I occasionally catch "Funky Winkerbean".  Today it is the story of a student at a book signing.  The author asks if she is a student and she replies "yes, I want to teach music, but I'm not sure that I have what it takes to be a band director".  The author tells her you never know until you try and to err on the side of confidence.  She asks "what if I fail?".  He replies that "it is a possibility but just make sure that it's a failure of risk rather than a failure of timidity".  Not doing is as much of a risk as doing.

I recently wrote about my adventures in trapeze flying.  It is not surprising that the same feelings that arise when you are about to take a physical risk are similar to the feelings that arise when we take a personal risk.  We may be about to change our career or tell someone what we really think or make a change to something that has worked for years.  Those same feelings of anxiety, tightness in the chest, fast heartbeat and shaking can happen with any of those choices.  Not doing can also produce those feelings.  My girlfriend stood at the top of the platform several times. She hesitated every time the trapeze flyers said "hep" - for jump!  Finally, near the end of our flying time, she jumped and loved every minute of it.  She was upset with herself for hesitating all of the previous times. 

Don't regret the things you didn't say or didn't try. Take a chance and enjoy the flight!

Just Jump!

I experienced this years ago at a Jamaican resort. The nightly entertainment at the hotel included a group of circus performers who swung through the air with the greatest of ease!  During the day you could try the trapeze with them as your guides. I remember climbing up the narrow ladder to the platform to try my hand at swinging through the air.  It was scary and fun at the same time.  It didn't hurt that the performers, my teachers, were very good looking men.  I remember flipping and getting caught by the other performer and landing safely in the net after my adventure.  Squeals and screams attracted other vacationers to see what the commotion was all about.  I was great for business!

I was ready to do it again.  I convinced a friend recently that this would be a great thing to try.  I discovered a facility a few hours away in Austin. I offered the adventure to my yoga students but none of them seemed interested in trying to kill themselves - as they described it.  So, my girl friend, (the only one crazy - or brave enough to join me?) and I headed West to "join the circus".  

We arrived at the trapeze school, signed our life away and proceeded to gear up - getting wrapped and clipped and cinched to uncomfortable levels.  Then it was time to climb.  This time, the trapeze seemed so much higher.  The climb up the tiny ladder to the platform 30 feet in the air seemed so much scarier.  Once at the top I was clipped to safety by the assistant as she unclipped me from one cable for safely climbing the ladder to the other cable for safety on the platform. "Hold on to that pole" she said "so that I can get you clipped". I hugged the pole like my life depended on it - and it did.  Finally, I was ready to go. She asked me to step the the edge of the platform and put all ten toes over the edge.  My body wouldn't move forward, but knowing that others waited below me for their turn finally propelled me to the edge of the platform.  I was clipped and strapped and there was a net and there wasn't any reason to fear for my life - but I did.  I reached out and grabbed the trapeze and she held me while I leaned forward like Rose Dewitt in the Titanic movie at the front of the ship.  I waited for the cue - "Hep" - to jump.  And I did, screaming all the way - and it was incredibly awesome. 

Even though we prepare to take a risk and do all the research, and even when we've done it before - it can still be a little scary to jump.  Trust in yourself.  It will be so much more fun than you ever imagined.